Who am I to you, and who are you to me?
True character is evidenced through your choices in a dilemma. Choice without a dilemma is a game that is not very revealing. How a person chooses to act under pressure is who he is, for all those in contact with him. Those same actions are what most often inform us about ourselves. We also might have some other imaginings about it, or reasoning as to why we do what we do. But how relevant are they if they never show up?
The greater the pressure, the truer and deeper revelation that choice gives. What I think that I really want is probably behind it all? And that desire may be orchestrated by many motivations. But after the choice has been made and the action is taken, even those motivations become irrelevant.
✓First of all, how many of us ever experience this kind of pressure? Timid steps (not) engaging with life keep that possibility very remote. Don’t get out of your safety zone.
✓Mostly we choose the same actions that the other guy chooses. For instance most companies don’t cut back on pollution until there is a law. “Everyone is doing it that way”. I’ll be the only one not looking out for myself.
✓A true choice freshly considers all the options, and/or discovers new options. Not many people are comfortable with making that level of choice. We are much better at simply doing what we did yesterday.
✓Is that a choice? Or is that just the choice to not make a choice?
How can we expand our life beyond that old paradigm? Don’t we have to try new stuff? We have to take a chance and measure the results. We have to trust ourselves to meet an unknown situation, and decide what to do about it right now, on the fly. To accomplish that we cannot be judging that only one choice is right and all the others are wrong. That immobilizes us. All the choices are experienced through this life. So if we are not in the habit of condemning ourselves, what’s there to loose? I went to the grocery store on the freeway, or I chose to go by the back roads. I am still at the grocery store.
Trying and measuring could be called an experiment. Doing that in the spirit of fun and playfulness could be a most effective way to expand life.