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Scott Kiloby 3rd Q&A Responses
Scott KilobyPaul wrote:
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Z wrote:
You seem to be pointing to Awareness as the non-conceptual space where one abides. Is this correct?
Scott's reply:
Ultimately, no person abides there. Awareness is what we are. It is prior to the thought, “I’m Scott.” The pointer “recognize awareness” is directed at that seeing. For those who have not had a direct, experiential introduction to what they are—awareness—it can be helpful, in the beginning, to allow all descriptions and labels about yourself, others, life, reality, and spirituality to come to rest completely. This reveals a non-conceptual space prior to all appearances (i.e., all thoughts, emotions, states, sensations, and experiences). For some, one look from and as this non-conceptual space is enough. In recognizing this non-conceptual awareness prior to thought, the entire “world of separate things” is seen to be nothing more than a conceptual overlay. In non-conceptual awareness, that overlay is absent. There is only pure awareness. For others, one moment of looking from and as awareness is not enough. Instead, it may be more helpful to allow all concepts to come to rest on a repeated basis, whenever it is convenient (i.e., throughout the day). As this happens, there becomes a natural return to this non-conceptual space. The moments of being able to rest as non-conceptual space become longer. Eventually, it is realized that this non-conceptual space is not an event in time to which you, as a separate person, are returning. It is realized that this space is what you are. “Leaving” and “returning” to awareness are seen to be appearances or experiences coming and going inseparably within the space. The space is ever present, whether it is recognized or not.
Z wrote:
So that’s it? If I get rid of thought, I’ve recognized awareness?
Scott's reply:
It’s all awareness. Awareness includes not only this non-conceptual space but also the concepts appearing and disappearing within and as the space. To believe otherwise is to split the universe in two, between something called non-conceptual awareness and concepts. Only thought would do that. In reality, there are “not two.”
Awareness includes all appearances (i.e., all thoughts, emotions, sensations, states, and experiences). Appearances cannot be found to have a separate existence. Nothing can stand outside awareness because there are no separate things. Things are not separately-existing “things” at all. They are thoughts. Try to conceive of a cup of coffee without the thought or mental image “cup of coffee” appearing. It is impossible. Living Realization is not about getting rid of anything. It is about seeing that there is no “thing” to get rid of. Again, it’s all awareness. This is why the basic invitation is repeated many times throughout the text. It is worth repeating here:
Recognize present awareness and, without manipulating appearances, see that appearances are inseparable from awareness.
No thought has ever been or will ever be experienced outside awareness. Thought is none other than awareness. It is inseparable from it. The invitation to recognize non-conceptual awareness is only an initial investigation or method. The other aspect of the invitation is to see that appearances are inseparable from awareness. In the moment of seeing a thought appear, notice that it is transparent just as non-conceptual awareness is transparent. Notice that this thought only happens because there is awareness here. This is another way of saying that thought is inseparable from awareness. Thoughts are temporary, empty images appearing inseparably within empty awareness.
Inseparability refers to the fact that you cannot pull a thought apart from the awareness in which it appears any more than you can pull a cloud apart from the space of the sky in which it appears. It’s all sky. It’s all awareness. The appearance of a cloud does not obscure the sky. The sky remains. It is just space itself. There is no object “sky.” That is just a concept. Similarly, awareness is not an object that we notice or return to. The word “awareness” is just a concept. That concept and all concepts come and go within actual, experiential space. You are that empty space.
The appearance of a thought cannot obscure the space in which the thought appears. Space has never been and can never be obscured by something appearing within and as the space. Once we know, unshakably, that our real identity is pure spacious awareness, we see that appearances are inseparable from it. At that point, there is no need to even allow thought to come to rest. Thought is seen to be the movement of awareness itself. In this seeing, thought naturally loses its emotional and psychological charge. There is naturally less or no identification with it. When identification with thought is absent, thought no longer causes suffering. It no longer seems as though thought is pointing to a reality “out there,” objectively separate from what you are.
Z wrote:
My experience is that when I try to not label things, there is no success, in that the mind just goes ahead and does label, regardless of the intention. The closest I can get to not labeling is to recognize that Space, which is simply aware, prior to and during, and even after the mind's conceptual overlay. In the basic invitation, it is my understanding that you are inviting me to de-emphasize, or don't chase after thought. In other words, when a question comes up, rather than needing to have it answered, just watch it arise, along with whatever energy comes with that, (like the frustration of not having the answer), and then just allow it to take its course, go back to where it came from, while I remain, just noticing the process?
Scott's reply:
Yes, that is another way of looking at the pointer “recognize present awareness and don’t move to manipulate appearances.” This space of awareness is here before, during, and after a thought or any other appearance that come and go within it. Simply noticing the coming and going of appearances (and by appearances I mean not only thoughts but also emotions, sensations, states, and experiences) we see that what notices those appearances is awareness, the unmoving, unchanging space itself. The point here is to not manipulate the appearances. This means to not analyze, neutralize, chase after, or try to get rid of the appearances, but rather to see them come and go within what you are—awareness. All of these appearances are happening spontaneously and involuntarily, including the movement of "chasing thoughts." Seeing these movements coming and going on their own allows us to realize our real identity as the space in which all of that is happening. It reveals that there is no separate self sense within us that has control of this flow of energy.
It is the recognition that you are this unchanging, unmoving space that is key. From that standpoint, it becomes easier to see that all appearances are inseparable from awareness—meaning they cannot appear outside awareness. They are appearances of awareness itself. Looking at it in this way, keeps us from believing that we must manipulate what appears. That which appears has no independent existence from the awareness within which it appears. To manipulate something would be to buy into a division between awareness and appearances within awareness. This division is not real.
Remember also that "trying" and "efforting" are appearances within awareness. This is what I mean by manipulating. There is an assumption that there is a central entity within us that can or that does manage all these appearances. But the thought that you must do something with appearances (and frankly that you must rest as awareness) is also just another appearance that comes and goes within awareness. However, resting as awareness can be helpful in the beginning. Ultimately, it is seen that your real identity is awareness and that appearances are already coming and going within what you are. This is a timeless seeing, not a doing in time that requires effort. Relax right now and see that what has been reading these words is already awake. Stick with that basic fact. These words, as well as all pointers, are simply coming and going within this awake space.
The basic invitation invites us to "not manipulate appearances." Doesn't this place us in a situation in which we do nothing? A place of detachment, complacency, and nihilism? If there is no self, why give a damn at all? The world was built on doing. Things only get done when I think about them and take action. You seem to be advocating laziness.
Scott's reply:
This comes from a misunderstanding. It comes from relying on thought or mental viewpoints to understand awareness or understand or predict what it would be like in the future if you were to recognize awareness. That is not the recognition of awareness, which is our ever present identity.
When there is identification with thought, you believe you are this thought-based self. You believe this thought-based self is acting autonomously as if this self can set itself apart from the rest of life and be in control of all future outcomes and make the other parts (i.e., selves and things) react a certain way and do certain things. For most people, this attempt at control doesn't work. It can, in fact, cause great suffering. Separation is the root of suffering.
In the story of self, some plans and attempts at controlling future outcomes seem to work out the way we would like them to. Other times, they don't seem to work out at all. Everyone has the right to continue believing that his or her identity resides in and as this thought-based self. No one is required to be interested in the recognition of awareness. You can go on living life from the sense of a personal will that tries to bring about future outcomes.
But when we begin to be interested in the experiential recognition of awareness as our real identity, this opens the door to a totally new possibility. In the recognition of awareness, we see that personal will and the attempts at control are just thoughts appearing and disappearing in present awareness. They have no power of their own. They are all based in the false assumption that there is a central, separate entity within us that can manage the various appearances in life (thoughts, emotions, states, sensations, and experiences). We come to see that this is not the case. These appearances come and go on their own. They have a life of their own. Life is living itself. We are not individuals who can set ourselves apart from life and act autonomously. We are not individual, separate managers of life who act completely independently of the rest of life.
In seeing through that separate self sense, the self-centeredness that comes with it is also seen through. We naturally stop acting from this place of self-centeredness, this place of trying to control outcomes, gain personal gratification, and fixate on personal stories. As this self is seen through, we realize that awareness has a natural wisdom that is not self-centered. We become interested, naturally, in being of service to others. We don't even insist that there are no others as a belief. Awareness is not about relying on beliefs. There is a knowing that there are no others and then, paradoxically, we become interested in being of service anyway. The mind trying to figure that out will only confuse itself. This is why it is important to keep awareness on the experiential level, rather than trying to understand it. No one understands awareness. It isn't a thought. It is what we are. We cannot understand what we are. We can only recognize and be what we are.
In the recognition of awareness, life continues unfolding. We don't sit on our couches in some belief about "non-doing" or "there is no one and nothing to do." Those are ideas that come and go in awareness just as "I'm a separate person who does things and controls outcomes" is an idea that comes and goes within awareness. Ideas continue arising in the recognition of awareness, but we are not interested in treating ideas as "truth" anymore. There is no reason to rely on them anymore. We identify with thought only when we believe our identity can be found there. In seeing that our identity is awareness, we stop looking for absolute truth and identity in thought.
And so a wisdom, love, peace, freedom, and compassion that is not based in identification with ideas, but rather that which is based in the recognition of awareness itself, begins to reveal itself naturally. We then get the sense that we are being lived, rather than separate selves in charge and in control. This is not an attitude of laziness, complacency, or nihilism. In some respects, there is more responsibility than ever, because the self-centeredness is seen through.
Laziness, complacency, and nihilism are all viewpoints of the separate self. They come from believing that awareness is something separate from the world, something we escape into so that we can leave all responsibility behind. Many get caught in that trap. Awareness is not about escape. It is not about detachment. It takes a separate person to detach itself from the world. The world has no separate existence from awareness. The world is a set of appearances and these appearances can never appear separate from awareness. The world is awareness and awareness is the world. This seeing reveals that the recognition of awareness is not about complacency and self-centered detachment or non-doing. Doing continues on, without the self-centeredness behind it.